So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
My brain says no but my pants say off.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
He shit in the fireplace
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
