is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
