This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
