Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Randomize