Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Randomize
