I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
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