So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
