Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Randomize
