so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
My new roommate is one of my Tinder matches... It is so on.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
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