we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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