i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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