Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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