ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
