So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Randomize