So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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