You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
