if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize