If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
How many fucks given?
0.12846
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
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