There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Randomize