As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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