Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Randomize