ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
