Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
