I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
Congratulations! We have a period
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
