did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
