The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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