Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
