if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
