she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize