yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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