He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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