The brown eye won't let me do that either.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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