Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Boobs speak an international language.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize
