I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
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