Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Randomize
