i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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