You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
