pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
