i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
