He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
