Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
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