belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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