"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
