So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
And then he peed in my hair
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