How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize
