You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
