would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
