I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
