My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Randomize
