you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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