The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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