I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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