Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize